A new year means a fresh slate. Many people say it is a good idea to start the year with a fresh perspective and focus on how to put your best foot forward.
There’s a Buddhist parable called The Second Arrow. The story explains that in life, things that don’t go the way we desire is inevitable. This is likened to being shot by an arrow – an instance which is outside of your personal control.
The option of pulling out that arrow and then complaining about the event is entirely on you. This is referred to as the second arrow. Here are a few tips to help you with that second arrow so you start the year with a clean slate as opposed to leaving remnants of those first arrows.
Practice Gratitude
Being truly grateful assists you in fresh perspective and putting your best foot forward.
Make a No “What Ifs” Rule
Spinning on what might have been keeps you from moving forward. Your thoughts may seem to circle back again and again to the things you think you could, or should, have done differently. When you catch yourself thinking a “what if,” just recognize that you didn’t, and move forward.
Get Physical
Take a weightlifting or yoga class or give one-foot barn cleaning or ballroom dancing a go. When you choose an activity that requires your focus to balance or to learn a sequence of motions, your brain will be busy doing something other than ruminating on arrow one. I really need to get this incorporated into my life in 2023. Stay tuned for how that goes.
Make a To-Do List
Having a plan for today keeps you from feeling ungrounded. If you fill your day with meaningful tasks, you will have something to keep you from focused forward and grounded. This takes time, but the payoff is seriously worth it.
Remember, Happiness is a Choice
In every moment, you have the choice to be happy. Victor Frankl, Austrian neurologist and psychiatrist who survived the Holocaust and founded the Third Viennese School of Psychotherapy, is said, “Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.” If you are choosing your old perspective as a pattern, consciously make the decision to replace it with a fresh perspective.
Start with a Mantra or Affirmation
If your day begins with a thought like, “Today is the first day of the rest of my life,” or “I’m excited for what today will bring,” it keeps your focus on the present and future. Choose a positive affirmation to start each day. One of my favorite gifts during the last year was a set of Daily Prayer cards given to me by a friend who lost her husband too early as well. Each card is a very short Bible verse focused on the good God provides. I would say those cards have helped my perspective each day more than anything. It does work. Try it!
Perspective – yours, mine and others – are all equally important. Take the time to know them all so you can ensure yours is fresh.